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Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
https://www.rsbandb.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=13&t=63078		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  Dokter Bob [ January 30th, 2008, 9:13 am ]
Post subject:  Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
Okay, I have this friend, lets call her Kim.

Anyway, she's a great friend of mine. I mean really great.
Granted, she is a year older than me, (not a suprise) but she told me something today...

It went along something like this..

"Hey guys I'm getting my nose pierced this Saturday."

Sure, not so bad. I reply:
"But wouldn't that hurt?"

And the line that keeps ringing in my head,
"No, I'm gonna have some "Stuff" with my friends so I wouldn't feel anything"

Guys, I'm worried about "Kim."
She's 13, and she's taking drugs/alchohol this Saturday.
I tried telling her that it was a bad idea, but she keeps replying, "Shut up, its my life, my decisions!" But the truth is...she's doing it to be "cool" like her friends.

So what should I do? Report her? Tell her parents?

I'm just really lost for words, and I need some help. :(
Author:  Adbot [ January 30th, 2008, 9:13 am ]
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Author:  Cowboyofdeath [ January 30th, 2008, 9:20 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
You should definitely prevent her from ruining her life by immediately telling someone.

She may be a good friend, but she won't be anyone after taking drugs.
Author:  Mr Pink [ January 30th, 2008, 9:38 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
Do anything in your power to prevent her making such foolish decisions, she will probably regret when is going to be older.
Author:  Kat [ January 30th, 2008, 9:46 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
Well, you need to tell her parents NOWWW!!!

That is *not* no kind of thing that should be considered "cool"

She may not be your friend if you tell on her, but in the future, she'll thank you.
Author:  Jaden [ January 30th, 2008, 10:05 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
In the long-run she will thank you for helping her because a life being addicted and controlled by drugs would be miserable.
Author:  Humus [ January 30th, 2008, 10:07 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
Warn her you wont be her friend otherwise. If that doesn't work; consult a teacher or your parents.
Author:  Adbot [ January 30th, 2008, 10:07 am ]
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Author:  CreepyPirate [ January 30th, 2008, 10:42 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
Give her a warning, tell her shes wrong and if she doesn't listen - Cut off all relations and let her know you think shes an idiot.

Let her wreck her life, just steer clear of it.
Author:  Red Spear1 [ January 30th, 2008, 11:25 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
Just say you wouldn't want to be involved with someone that does drugs.

If you matter as much to her as she does to you, she wouldn't go near them.
Author:  Ryan [ January 30th, 2008, 11:28 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
CreepyPirate wrote:
Give her a warning, tell her shes wrong and if she doesn't listen - Cut off all relations and let her know you think shes an idiot.

Let her wreck her life, just steer clear of it.


I agree. You need to leave people to make their own decisions. Right or wrong, they choose what to do. She'll realise what shes done sooner or later.

If your too cautious, its good to tell an adult, and then kinda back away from the situation. Don't get yourself involved, you don't wanna get caught in them types of things.
Author:  zvono [ January 30th, 2008, 12:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
Smack my ***** up!

Actually no :S

This is what I did with a friend of mine who did pills, tell him stop that **** or I'll just phone your parents and tell the whole story and think about others who you're dragging in that.
Author:  Josh [ January 30th, 2008, 1:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
i'm glad to see there's so many responsible people here. but yeah i would let someone know or get advice from someone older.
Author:  Steven [ January 30th, 2008, 2:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
Jeez...

Drugs and Alcohol are bad things indeed.

First, tell her off with a warning, tell her you'll not be her friend anymore if she does take a drug or a alcoholic beverage.

Second, if she doesn't listen, tell her that she will be phoned to her parents about this and she could get in some serious trouble from her mother and father.

Last, and ONLY as a LAST RESORT, if you know where the party is going to be located, call the police and tell them that there is some underage people at the house drinking alcohol and doing illegal drugs.

I've been asked to "puff a johny" before and I said no, same goes with beer and drugs, just say no.

This has happened to a good friend of mine and he almost did it.

Also Bob, I forgot to add:

Some people can have allergic reactions to drugs and they die, due to chemicals in the drug, tell her she will die if she does some and she's alergic. This is serious if you don't want her to die.
Author:  MattVortex [ January 30th, 2008, 3:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
Do not worry too much about the alcohol. Sure, if she gets runk and gets in trouble with the police, that's bad. If she gets addicted, that's bad. But in my eyes there's really nothing wrong with a bit of alcohol. Drinking alcohol with friends is a good thing to do - it relaxes the mood, makes people friendlier, makes everything generally more fun. 13 is a little young, I'll admit, but you still should not be worried.

If the drugs are just straight pot, don't worry too much yet. There isn't much wrong with a bit of cannabis every now and then. She shouldn't take it regularly, and if you get the suspicion she is addicted to or it takes it on a regular basis or whatever, that should be stopped. If she's taking it one-off with a few friends in a social situation, I do not really see how you have a right to judge her for it. If it's actually affecting her as a person - her personality or health or whatever, then you should worry.

In the scenario you have described, I personally believe the thing you should be worrying most about is her 'friends'. If they're the kind who do get drunk and stoned all the time, then she should not be mixing them. Some people take drink and drugs as a social thing occasionally - there's nothing really wrong with that, imo. Some people take them very regularly, with adverse effects to their health and so on. That's bad.
Author:  Chris [ January 30th, 2008, 3:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
MattVortex wrote:
Do not worry too much about the alcohol. Sure, if she gets runk and gets in trouble with the police, that's bad. If she gets addicted, that's bad. But in my eyes there's really nothing wrong with a bit of alcohol. Drinking alcohol with friends is a good thing to do - it relaxes the mood, makes people friendlier, makes everything generally more fun. 13 is a little young, I'll admit, but you still should not be worried.

If the drugs are just straight pot, don't worry too much yet. There isn't much wrong with a bit of cannabis every now and then. She shouldn't take it regularly, and if you get the suspicion she is addicted to or it takes it on a regular basis or whatever, that should be stopped. If she's taking it one-off with a few friends in a social situation, I do not really see how you have a right to judge her for it. If it's actually affecting her as a person - her personality or health or whatever, then you should worry.

In the scenario you have described, I personally believe the thing you should be worrying most about is her 'friends'. If they're the kind who do get drunk and stoned all the time, then she should not be mixing them. Some people take drink and drugs as a social thing occasionally - there's nothing really wrong with that, imo. Some people take them very regularly, with adverse effects to their health and so on. That's bad.


I agree with Matt here. If it is an occasional thing, let her do it. If she becomes, dare I say, hardcore, that is when you should step in. Things like that can really change people, I can personally back that up.

But, there is something else I must mention. If she is taking something that is potentially very dangerous, then you must do whatever you can to stop it. By this I mean controlled medication such as painkillers or other drugs such as cocaine, LSD, or heroin, then you DEFINITELY need to intervene. Substances such as that can easily ruin not just her own life, but others as well.
Author:  Mushroom Queen [ January 30th, 2008, 3:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Everyone Post Here-- I need Advice...
I'm going to have to disagree with the above two posts. You need to act according to what you consider to be right and wrong. If you still want to be friends with her, you have to let her know that you see what she's doing as being wrong. Of course, you don't want to force your views on someone else, but you really need to let her know that drinking/taking drugs before getting a piercing is a bad idea. All she really needs is some Aspirin.
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